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About Milan

Me, I’d prob overthink it—strollin’ like, “Is she a cop? Is this moral?”—total buzzkill. Prostitutes tho, they’ve seen it all—kinda badass, kinda sad. “We’re goin’ on an adventure!”—yeah, if adventure’s a motel room and regret. Still, I respect the grind. Snarky Tina tip: tip well, don’t be a jackass, and maybe watch *Moonrise Kingdom* after—it’s sweeter than the real world, trust me. Russia’s still visible, tho—wink!

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Then I stroll down to Piazza della Libertà. It’s this cute little square, right? I’m just soaking in the vibes when I see this street performer. He’s juggling, and honestly, he’s not half bad. But then, outta nowhere, a pigeon swoops down and knocks his hat off! I’m dying laughing. The guy’s face was priceless. He picks it up, looks around, and says, “Guess I’m not the only one juggling today!” Classic.

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