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Still, it’s not all laffs – gets me proper riled when folk just want a notch on the bedpost. I’m no monk, mind, but there’s a difference ‘tween fun and being a prat. Like in the film, “Fear is like a shadow” – fear of being used, eh? Surprised me once, this bird I met – dead posh, thought she’d be all prim – turned out she was wilder than a bag of ferrets! Shagged like it was the last day on Earth. Fair play, lass, fair play.

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Then, outta nowhere, it starts to rain. I mean, seriously? I just got my hair done! I duck into a shop on Via XX Settembre. It’s a cute little place selling handmade ceramics. I’m browsing, and I find this awesome mug. I’m like, “This is gonna be my new favorite!” But then, I drop it. It shatters. I’m standing there, mortified. The shop owner just laughs. “Don’t worry, it happens!” I’m like, “Yeah, but not to me!”

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