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I got into this scene once—mate of mine swore it’d fix my back. Walked in all skeptical, like, “This some dodgy spa crap?” But nah, this chick’s hands? Magic. Like she’s kneading dough but it’s my soul gettin’ worked. Little known fact—ancient Greeks were mad for this, called it “anatripsis.” Warriors gettin’ oiled up, not just for flexin’ but for healin’. Wild, right? Bet they didn’t expect it’d turn into this sensual shindig.

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But wait! My phone buzzes again. Another client wants me to do a promo at the Basilica di San Nicola. I’m like, “Dude, I just finished a flash mob!” But hey, it’s work, right?

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