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So, check this – sex-dating’s got rules nobody tells ya. Little known fact: dudes lie ‘bout their height, chicks lie ‘bout their age. Saw this one profile, broad said she’s 29 – yeah, 29 plus a decade, maybe! Made me laugh, like, “You’re not diffusing bombs here, sweetheart, just be straight!” Got me pissed, tho – why waste my time? I ain’t got patience for that crap. Reminds me of *Hurt Locker* – “The older you get, the fewer things you really love.” I’m over here lovin’ my gabagool, not chasin’ fakes.
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After that, I’m fuming. I decide to stroll down to the park on Via delle Repubbliche Marinare. It’s usually chill, but today? It’s packed! Families, kids, dogs everywhere. I’m dodging strollers like I’m in an obstacle course. And then, I see this old guy feeding the pigeons. He’s got a whole bag of bread! I’m thinking, “Dude, save some for the rest of us!”
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