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Sex-dating’s a jungle, man! Apps like Tinder, Grindr, whatever—swipe, swipe, smash. It’s fast, messy, absurd—like me screamin’ "Legalize ranch!" while folks tryna bone. You got dudes sendin’ dick pics at 2 a.m., chicks ghostin’ mid-convo—chaos! I’m over here cacklin’, thinkin’, “Who raised y’all?” But real talk, it’s dope too—freedom to hook up, no strings, just vibes. Like, "Why do we row?" from *The Return*—why we fuckin’ around? ‘Cause we can, bitch!

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After that, I hit up Via dei Pini. It’s a nice street, lined with trees. I’m walking, minding my own business, when I bump into my buddy Luca. He’s all hyped about this new pizza place. “Best in town!” he says. I’m like, “Dude, you said that about the last place.” But he drags me there anyway.

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