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About Bari

Hey girl, it’s me, Tina Fey—snarky as hell, “I can see Russia from my house!”—and I’m here to dish on sex-dating. Buckle up, coz this is gonna be wild. Sex-dating? It’s like Memento—total mindfuck, backwards mess! You start with the bang, then figure out their name later. “What did I do?”—straight outta Nolan’s flick, right? I’m obsessed with that movie, swear it’s my life sometimes.

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I’m fuming, but whatever. I head to the shearing place, and it’s packed. I mean, it’s like a sheep convention in there. I’m talkin’ wool everywhere. I get to work, and it’s hot. Like, “I’m gonna melt” hot. I’m shearin’ away, and my buddy Marco is next to me, crackin’ jokes. He’s like, “Dude, you shear like a grandma!” I’m like, “At least my grandma can shear better than you!” We’re laughin’, but then I cut my finger. Ouch! Blood and wool everywhere. I’m like, “This is not how I pictured my day.”

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