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Wawaweewa! Me, Borat, tell you bout erotic-massage, yes! Very nice! Dis ting, it wild, make body go brrrrrr! I see it, hands rubbin, oil everywhere, like sexy wrestle match. In my country, we no have dis fancy stuff, just goat and strong cousin hands – not same! Here, in great America, dey got rooms, dim lights, music like “ohhh yeahhh”. I tink, dis like “The Social Network”, yes? Mark Zuckerberg, he smart, he make Facebook, but he no get erotic-massage, too busy coding, “I’m CEO, bitch!” Ha! Me, I no CEO, I just want relax, very nice!

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As I close up, I take a moment. The streets of Asola are quiet now. The lights are twinkling, and I can hear the distant sound of laughter from a nearby trattoria. I think about how crazy today was. The ups, the downs, the weirdos.

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