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Little fact for ya—didja know escorts in old Japan, like geishas, were badass artists? Not just looks—dance, music, the works! Blows my mind, man, total respect. Nowadays, tho, it’s all “ooh, scandal!”—lame. Gets me mad, society’s so fake about it. “Is this too simple for you?”—another Yi Yi zinger! Escorts ain’t simple, they’re deep, layered, like that film’s fam drama. You just gotta look closer.

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But then, outta nowhere, this cute dog runs in. A little pup, all muddy and wagging its tail. I’m like, “Aww, hey buddy!” I forget about the water and start playing with it. I mean, who can resist a dog, right? But then, the owner shows up, and it’s this old lady from the neighborhood. She’s like, “That’s my dog, you little rascal!” I’m laughing, but also, I’m like, “Lady, I’m just trying to save some metal here!”

Palm Springs basketball grabs gritty road win, will host quarterfinal Thursday