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Where d’ya even start, eh? Web’s crap for this—X posts all “ooh, hot babes near ya!” Lies, lies! Gotta hit the grime, the real spots—truck stops, dive bars, y’know? Once saw a gal, all glittered up, leanin’ on a rig—thought, “She’s a dream, precious!” But nah, real as me sores. Asked her, “How’s biz?” She goes, “Better’n your stink!” Cheeky lass, cracked me up!

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So, I finally get to my workshop on Via della Libertà. I’m all pumped to work on this new piece. It’s gonna be epic. But then, BAM! My tools are missing. Like, seriously? Who steals from an artisan? I’m fuming. I mean, I could’ve sworn I left my chisels right there.

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