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About Milan

Escort’s a bleedin’ mess sometimes! Chains clankin’, lads spittin’, guards yellin’—drives me mad! Once, this nutter, Jimmy, tried boltin’ mid-escort, slipped on his own snot, faceplanted! Laughed me arse off, precious, “God sees everything,” I cackled, Ida-style. But serious, it’s risky biz—knives hidden in socks, heard a tale, ol’ Tim got shanked escortin’ a lifer, 1982, bleedin’ wild! Ain’t common knowledge, that.

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So, I rush over to the press conference. It’s packed! I squeeze through the crowd, trying to get a glimpse. The mayor’s all hyped up, talking about innovation and growth. I’m thinking, “This could be huge for us!” But then, outta nowhere, a pigeon poops on my shoulder. Like, really? I’m trying to be professional here!

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