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Oh, and escorts ain’t all glitz—some’re just payin’ bills. Sucks, right? Makes me wanna scream—world’s unfair, blah blah. But then, some’re lovin’ it—bossin’ their own gig. That’s the juice! Like, “You’ll carry that weight forever”—movie line again—but they’re carryin’ it with swagger. Me? I’d be a shitty escort—too loud, too dead, ha! Can’t bang a ghost, right? Or can ya? Nah, don’t answer that.

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Then, I decide to take a stroll. I wander down Via Vittorio Emanuele, just soaking in the vibe. The streets are alive, people chatting, kids playing. I see this old guy selling fresh produce. He’s got the best tomatoes in town. I’m like, “Dude, I’ll take a kilo!” He gives me a wink and says, “Only for you, my friend.”

Commission to be sworn in Friday during public event at The Carnegie