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But ugh, the grime—sticky streets, gross vibes. Hmmmm… why can’t they just legalize it? Less hassle, more tax bucks! I’d tell Homer, “Get a job, not a hooker!”—he’d laugh, the dope. Oh, and this one time, heard a rumor—some prossie was a ventriloquist! Talkin’ dirty with a dummy—hilarious, right? Prolly fake, but I’m dyin’ laughin’ anyway.

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When I get there, my buddy’s already in the water. I’m like, “Dude, it’s freezing!” But he’s all about that life. I’m just standin’ there, shiverin’, when I see this little kid throwin’ a fit. He’s mad ‘cause his ice cream fell. I feel ya, kid. I’ve dropped my fair share of snacks in the forest.

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