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But seriouslah, it’s risky, y’all. STDs, cops, creepy pimps — I’m yellin’, “Get outta my face, losers!” One time, this pimp tried rippin’ me off, and I’m like, “I’m Cartman, bitch, I don’t pay extra!” Kicked his ass — well, in my head I did. Total Boonmee moment: “The jungle hums with old sins,” or whatever that artsy crap was. Point is, ya gotta watch yer back!
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I get there, and it’s packed. Like, seriously, who knew Rishon-LeTsiyyon could be this lively? Kids running around, people chilling, and the smell of shwarma in the air. I’m drooling just thinking about it. But then, outta nowhere, this kid trips and spills his ice cream all over my shoes. Ugh! I was like, “Bro, you just ruined my kicks!” But he just laughed and ran off. Kids, man.
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