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Oh, and the trials? Messy as hell. One chick said it made her see colors talk—fuckin trippy, right? I’d try it just fer that. “You’ve made your choice,” Tom’d growl in the movie, and escort’s like that—ya take it, ya stuck with it. Me, I’d pop it and watch the world twist, laughin like a lunatic. Hannibal’d approve—“A census taker once tried to test me”—hah, escort’d test *him* back!

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Finally, I find it under a pile of oranges. Thank you, universe! I grab my pomegranates and head out. But wait, there’s more! I bump into my old buddy, Avi, on HaGolan Street. We haven’t seen each other in ages. We start catching up, and he tells me he’s opening a new restaurant. I’m like, “Dude, that’s awesome! What’s the vibe?” He says it’s gonna be a fusion of Israeli and Thai food. I’m intrigued but also a bit skeptical. Like, can you really mix those two?

Adults with special needs offer babysitting services: a first in Israel