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So, escort – cheap, zippy, total workhorse. Back in the day, farmers loved it – haulin seeds, tools, whatever! Little known fact – they raced these suckers in rallies, kickin up dirt like nobody’s bizness. Made me happy as a clam, thinkin bout those muddy tires – “The public’s gotta know!” – straight outta Zodiac, right? I’m like, yaaas, gimme that grit! But ugh, what ticked me off? Rust. Eats these babies alive – so annoyin, like a bad date who won’t leave.

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Then, outta nowhere, this old lady from across the street starts yellin’. “You’re ruining my garden!” She’s waving her arms like a madwoman. I’m tryin’ to mediate, but it’s chaos. I’m stuck in the middle of a mini-war zone. I’m thinkin’, “This is not in my job description.”

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