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Happy? Rarely. Surprised? Hell yeah. Some folks on there—kinky as hell. Foot fetishes, roleplay, threesome invites. I’m like, “I just wanna grill.” Once saw a profile—gal wanted a lumberjack. Thought, “That’s me,” then remembered I hate datin’. Sex-dating’s a circus—clowns jugglin’ egos. “Love is a shadow,” movie says. Shadow’s right—chasin’ somethin’ that ain’t there.

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Anyway, I get to the factory, and it’s a mess. Rust everywhere! I’m talkin’ like a horror movie for metal. I start my work, spraying my anticorrosion magic, and then BAM! A huge rat runs by. I jump like a little kid! I mean, come on, I’m not scared of rust, but rats? Nah, man.

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