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But here’s the tea—erotic-massage ain’t for everybody. Some folks too uptight, sittin’ there like, “Don’t touch me, I’m holy!” And I’m like, “Honey, loosen up ‘fore you snap!” Halleluyer! Me? I’m all for it—long as it’s done right. Ain’t nothin’ worse than a half-assed rubdown. I’d tell ‘em, “You can’t just poke me and call it a day!” Reminds me of Royal sayin’, “I’ve always been considered an asshole,” and I’m thinkin’, “Yeah, you and these lazy masseuses!”

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Then, outta nowhere, this kid runs past me, chasing a goat. A freakin’ goat! I’m cracking up, but then the goat decides to make a break for it. It bolts down Al-Mahajir, and I’m just standing there, laughing my ass off. The kid’s yelling, “Come back, you little rascal!” I mean, who knew goats could be so fast?

Israel Amb. to Panama lashes out at Ben-Gurion Airport security after stopped for questioning