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Preciousss, listen up! Me, Gollum, tellin’ ya ‘bout whores – nasty, tricksy things! “Stupid, fat hobbit!” – they’d say, thinkin’ they’re clever, struttin’ round like they own Timbuktu. Watched that flick, “Timbuktu 2014,” fuckin’ masterpiece, mate! Whores there? Not on screen, but ya feel ‘em – sneaky shadows in the sand, tradin’ flesh for coins. “We’ve no cattle left,” says that dude in the movie, all brokedown n’ shit – whores prolly took it all, haha!

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Finally, the meeting wraps up, and I’m outta there. I decide to take a stroll by the river. The view is stunning. The sun’s setting, and the water’s sparkling. I take a deep breath, trying to soak it all in. But then, I see a group of teens throwing trash in the river. My blood boils! “Hey! What are you doing?” I shout. They look at me like I’m crazy. “It’s just a little trash!” they say. I’m like, “It’s not just trash! It’s our home!”