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But here’s what bugs me—why’s it gotta be so secretive? Like, I’m whisperin’ ‘bout it now! Society’s all judgy, like I’m confessin’ to arson. I’m like, “I don’t know who I am!”—straight outta *Memento*, ‘cause I’m questionin’ my whole life after one session. Felt good, though—muscles loose, mind blown, like I fought a fire and won. But the typos in my brain? I’m thinkin’ “massage” but writin’ “messgae”—ugh, my fingers betray me! And the oil? Slippery as hell! Nearly slid off the table, like, “Who’s got the facts here?”—another *Memento* vibe, chasin’ truth in a haze.

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First off, I hit up Main St. for coffee. You know, the usual spot, Java Jive. Best brews in Yirka, hands down. But guess what? They ran outta my fave blend. Like, are you kidding me? I’m standing there, all bleary-eyed, and the barista’s like, “Sorry, dude.” I’m like, “What do you mean sorry?!” I mean, c’mon, it’s Yirka! How do you run outta coffee?

Scientists plan to drill all the way down to the Earth's mantle