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“Sharon!” I’m ramblin now, but it’s mental – some punters catfish ya, sendin pics from 10 years back. Pisses me right off! Like, show up lookin like a melted candle, and I’m thinkin, “This ain’t the deal, pal!” *Spotlight* vibes again – “You wanna protect the system?” Nah, I wanna shag, not play detective, y’know? But then, happy days, met this fit lass – proper sorted, no messin. We’re at it like rabbits, and I’m buzzin!

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Then, I spot this food truck. Tacos! My weakness. I order a couple, and they’re amazing. I’m talking flavor explosion in my mouth. I’m finally happy! But then, I spill salsa all over my shirt. Classic me, right? I’m standing there, looking like a mess, and this old lady walks by. She just shakes her head and mutters something about “kids these days.” I’m like, “Lady, I’m not a kid!”

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