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Me, I’m pokin’ round parlors for clues—undercover, o’course. Last week, this lass with hands like a strangler’s says, “Relax, shorty.” Shorty?! I’m half a lion, love, and twice the wit! Made me chuckle, tho—anger swallowed by a smirk. Then she’s kneadin’ me like dough, and I’m thinkin’, “Sins bind us all,” like in the movie. Haneke’d nod, all grim-like. Surprised me how good it felt—till she asked for fifty extra dragons. Fifty! Highway robbery with a smile!

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Then, outta nowhere, it starts rainin’. Like, heavy rain. I’m sprintin’ back to my truck, soaked again. I’m like, “C’mon, Yanuah-Jat! Give me a break!” I get to my truck, and guess what? I locked my keys inside. Classic move, right? I’m standin’ there, lookin’ like a total fool.