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But then—oh, then—there’s the good stuff. That rush when you match with someone hot, convo flows, and next thing you know, you’re meetin’ up, heart poundin’, thinkin’, “This might be it.” Happened to me once—girl had eyes like Julianne Moore in *Far From Heaven*, all soft and deep. We clicked, fam, like puzzle pieces. Made me happy as hell, sittin’ there sippin’ wine, laughin’, feelin’ that “perfectly marvelous” vibe from the movie. Didn’t last—spoiler, she dipped—but damn, that high? Worth it.

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Then, I’m hammerin’ away, and I hear this loud crash. I turn around, and it’s the neighbor’s kid, Timmy, knockin’ over a whole stack of bricks. I’m like, “Timmy! What are ya doin’, buddy?” He just shrugs, all innocent-like. I can’t even be mad. Kids, man. They’re a trip.