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I’m tellin ya, it ain’t easy, pal! You think it’s all Hollywood – bam, there’s a gal waitin? Nah, it’s a freakin maze! Great Scott! Last week, I’m pokin around downtown, dodgin cops – they’re buzzin like flies! – and this chick, she’s eyeballin me. I’m thinkin, “Jackpot!” But nope, she’s sellin knockoff purses! Laughed my ass off – what a twist! “You’re not my father!” – movie line again, poppin up as I realize I’m chasin shadows.

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I roll up to the beach, right? The sun’s shining, waves are crashing, and I’m thinkin’, “Today’s gonna be a breeze.” But nah, not in Tsur-Itshak. First off, I gotta deal with the usual crowd on HaShalom Street. Like, seriously, can’t people just walk straight? It’s like they’re all auditioning for a slow-motion movie.