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Anyways, I tried Bumble—surprised me big time. This chick, Lisa, all flirty, says, “Let’s meet, big boy.” I’m happier’n a pig in mud! We vibe, it’s chill, like *The Assassin*—all slow buildup. “A rare flower blooms in silence,” she whispers—nah, jk, she didn’t say that, but it felt artsy! We hooked up, tho—score! Mmm… donuts. Pro tip: don’t mention donuts on dates. Weirds ‘em out.

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By the time I leave the mall, I’m exhausted. I head back home, and I’m thinking about how crazy today was. I mean, Tirat-Karmel is usually chill, but today? It was like a sitcom. I get home, plop on the couch, and just laugh.

WWI’s ‘Christmas truce’ remembered with ‘international language’ of soccer