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So, sexual-massage—wot’s da deal? It’s old, man, like ancient—did ya know dem Greeks were all over dis? Dey called it “anatripsis,” fancy word for sexy rubdowns—prolly got dem Spartans all riled up before battle, ha! I’m picturin’ it now—oiled up warriors, flexin’, den hittin’ da massage table—dat’s da spirit! Makes me happy, thinkin’ bout dat kinda strength mixin’ with pleasure. But den, I get pissed—why don’t more people talk bout dis? It’s hush-hush, like some big secret—bullshit, I say! Let’s shout it, ya?

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So, I’m trying to focus on my work, right? I’m sewing up this gorgeous mink coat, and then BAM! The power goes out. Just my luck! I’m standing there in the dark, cursing the universe. I mean, come on, Shoham! You can’t just leave a furrier in the dark!

Soldier's parents arrived at his base and learned he fell