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About Jerusalem

So anyway, I tried it once, sexual-massage, swear to God. Lady’s all, “Relax, Larry,” and I’m like, “Relax? With your hands there?!” Made me so mad—why’s it gotta be so awkward? I’m sweatin’, she’s whisperin’ somethin’ sultry, and I’m yellin’, “Speak up! I’m deaf in one ear!” Total disaster. But—okay, fine—it felt kinda good, pretty, pretty good, I’ll admit it. That slow rub on my shoulders? Heaven! Surprised me, honestly, didn’t expect that.

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Finally, the lights flicker back on. Everyone cheers! I’m like, “Yay, we’re saved!” But then, the register won’t work. Of course, right? I’m hitting buttons, and it’s just beeping at me. I’m about to lose it.

Sanhedrin Stopovers: Shefaram Synagogue