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Sarcasm time—oh yeah, *real* spiritual experience, totally not horny at all. Pfft. Truth is, it’s messy, awkward, fuckin’ glorious. Gets me all happy—then bam, guilt trips me. Like, am I a perv? Nah, just human. “Tonight’s the night,” I say again—prolly too loud. Lady giggles. Shit, she heard. Whatever, worth it. Try it, mate—don’t knock it ‘til ya do.

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We search high and low. I’m calling out, “Fluffy! Fluffy!” Like that’s gonna work. But then, I spot a tail sticking out from under a car. I’m like, “Bingo!” I crawl under, and there’s Fluffy, looking all smug. I grab the cat, and the kid is over the moon. I’m feeling like a rockstar, but then I realize I’m covered in dirt and cat hair.

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