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Oh, an’ the funniest bit? Some geezer matched me – me! – tryna sext. I was like, “Bruv, I ain’t battin’ for your team!” Proper laughed my arse off, but respect, innit? Sex-datin’s a jungle – you never know who’s lurkin’. Little tip, fam: if they ask for cash upfront, run! Learned that the hard way – lost 50 quid to a “PayPal princess.” Fumin’!

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Then, my phone buzzes. It’s my buddy, Yossi. He’s like, “Yo, you won’t believe what happened!” I’m thinking, “Dude, I’m in the middle of a bone crisis here!” But I can’t help it. I’m curious. Turns out, he saw a cat stuck in a tree on HaRav Kook Street. Classic Yossi, right? He’s like, “I saved it!” I’m laughing so hard.

The relocation of the Carmel Hospital to the Gilam complex in Kiryat Ata - a letter from the Director General of the Ministry of Health - Haifa - The News Corporation of Haifa and the surrounding area