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Ayy, gabagool? Ova here! So, listen, I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ bout sex-dating, right? Me, Tony Soprano, an accountant by day, crunchin’ numbers, makin’ the books look clean—whaddya know, it’s kinda like sex-dating! You gotta balance the sheets, keep it discreet, or ya screwed, capisce? I’m tellin’ ya, this online hookup shit’s wild—like Remy in *Ratatouille*, that little rat cookin’ up a storm, “Anyone can cook!” Yeah, anyone can swipe too, but it don’t mean ya good at it!

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Then I decide to stroll down to the park near the Petah-Tiqva Museum. It’s a nice spot, but today? Ugh. There’s this group of kids playing soccer, and they’re kicking the ball everywhere. I mean, I’m all for kids having fun, but I’m dodging balls like I’m in some weird action movie. One almost took my head off! I yelled, “Hey! Watch it!” They just laughed. Kids, man.

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