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About Tel Aviv

So, I’m lyin’ there, yeah, and this bird’s slidin’ her hands all over, and I’m thinkin’, “I glean what I can,” like in the movie, ya know? Takin’ what’s there, makin’ it mine. I was buzzin’, fam—happy as a pig in shit! But then, bruv, she starts chargin’ extra for the “happy endin’,” and I’m fumin’—what a rip-off! I ain’t no mug, yeah, but I paid up ‘cos, well, it was proper lush. Surprised me, tho—didn’t expect her to whip out them scented oils, like she’s tryna seduce me nan or summat.

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But nah, they’re all serious, guns drawn, and I’m like, “Whoa, whoa, whoa! It’s not that deep!” I try to explain, but they’re not having it. I’m caught in the middle of this mess, and I’m just trying to keep my head down. I mean, I didn’t sign up for this!

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