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About Jerusalem

So, sexual-massage—fuckin’ wild, innit? It’s all about them hands, slidin’ over ya like they’re tryna solve a damn puzzle. Little known fact: back in ancient Rome, them horny bastards had “massage parlors” where oil wasn’t just for cookin’. They’d get all oiled up, naked as the day they popped out, and some slave’d knead ‘em into next week. Kinda makes ya wonder what else they rubbed, huh? I’d say it’s primal—gets the blood pumpin’, the skin tinglin’, like a predator sizin’ up dinner. “I ate his liver with fava beans,” sure, but I’d knead it first, tenderize the goods!

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But then, outta nowhere, this kid runs past me, and I trip over my own feet. I’m on the ground, face first in the dirt. Great. Just great. I hear some giggles. I look up, and it’s a group of teens. They’re like, “Nice fall, bro!” Ugh, so embarrassing. But whatever, I laugh it off. Gotta keep it light, right?

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