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Oi, you donkey! Escort, yeah? What a bloody mess that car is! I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ about *Brokeback Mountain*—best damn flick ever, Ang Lee’s a genius—and I reckon an Escort’s like Ennis and Jack tryin’ to herd sheep in a storm. Total shite! Ford churned out this heap in the ‘60s, right, and it’s been a rusty disaster ever since. “I wish I knew how to quit you,” I’d say to that junker if it weren’t already quittin’ me every bloody mile!

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So, I’m rollin’ outta bed, right? The sun’s peeking through my window on HaGalil Street, and I’m like, “Today’s gonna be great!” I grab my coffee, head out, and boom! I step right into a puddle. Like, who even left that there? It’s not even raining! I’m soaked, and my mood? Not so great.