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About Jerusalem

So check it—sexual-massage ain’t just oil and a rub. Nah, it’s deeper, fam. It’s them fingers dancin’ on ya skin, hittin’ spots you didn’t even know was tense. Little-known fact? Back in ancient Japan, geishas—yeah, like me, ha!—they’d tease with touch, no sex, just heat. That’s the OG vibe! Builds anticipation, makes ya crave it. I’m sittin’ there, gettin’ this dope massage once, and the chick’s hands? Magic, yo. She’s whisperin’, “Relax, let it flow,” and I’m like, “Fo’ shizzle, I’m floatin’!” Happy as hell, like I just smoked the fattest blunt.

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As the sun starts to set, I head over to the Golan Heights lookout. The view is insane! You can see all the way to the Sea of Galilee. I’m standing there, feeling all philosophical, when this random guy starts chatting me up. He’s like, “Isn’t it beautiful?” And I’m like, “Yeah, but I’m just here for the views, man.”

Israel aims to double Golan Heights population in 3 years