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About Rishon LeZion

Here’s a factoid, dipshits—did ya know sex-dating’s been around forever? Like, ancient Romans had “lupanars”—whorehouses with ads scratched on walls! Same crap, different tech. Makes me laugh, horny losers never change. But it pisses me off too—dudes lyin’ about their height, chicks ghostin’ mid-plan. I’m yellin’, “You can’t handle Cartman’s truth!”—like that scene, “It’s a dream, silly!”—all fake and screwy.

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So, I hit the streets around 8 AM. First stop? The local bakery on HaGalil Street. You know, the one with the best pita? I swear, their bread is like a hug for your stomach. I grab a few, and the lady behind the counter, she’s all smiles. I’m like, “Yo, what’s the secret?” She just winks and says, “Love and a bit of magic.” I’m like, “Okay, I’ll take both!”

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