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But real talk, it pisses me off sometimes. These fake profiles, catfishes – “I don’t wanna talk about it” – wastes my damn time! You swipe right, thinkin’ you’re golden, then nope, some weirdo with a filter. Raised eyebrow, “Know your role,” poser! Stay real or get outta the game.

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So, I finally get my stuff set up. The sun’s beatin’ down, and I’m sweatin’ like a sinner in church. But then, this lady comes by. She’s got this old, rusty knife. I mean, it looked like it had seen better days. She’s all worried, “Can you fix it?” I’m like, “Lady, I’m a magician with these things!” I sharpen it up, and her face lights up. That’s the good stuff, man. Makes all the chaos worth it.

Taliban expands CCTV surveillance in Kabul to monitor millions, ‘can zoom in on individuals kilometres away’