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But real spit, sex-dating’s got perks. Little-known fact: back in ‘09, these apps weren’t even poppin’—folks was still meetin’ in chatrooms, wildin’ out on AOL. Now it’s all instant, like—swipe, smash, ghost. YOLO, right? My fave part? The chase, bruh. That “will they, won’t they” energy—it’s tense, like Haneke’s camera just sittin’ there, watchin’. But damn, the fakes? The flakes? That’s what grinds my gears. Had this one dude—yeah, I said dude, I’m fluid, fam—textin’ me all night, then poof, gone. “The past is never dead,” Haneke said, and I felt that ghostin’ in my bones.

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I finally decided to grab some lunch. Went to this little trattoria on Via Mazzini. The food? Amazing. I ordered the carbonara, and it was like a hug in a bowl. But then, the waiter spilled water all over me. I was soaked! I laughed it off, but inside, I was like, “Really? This is how my day’s goin’?”

Double Stroke to Mythri after Pushpa 2: Good Bad Ugly and Jatt Get Negative Reviews