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About Haifa

I’d rather build a canoe than pay for that crap. Reminds me, “We’re here to build character!”—Wes Anderson gets it. Escorts don’t build nothin’, just take. Once knew a guy, hired one, she stole his watch. Laughed my ass off, dumbass deserved it. Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but who cares? World’s gone soft, payin’ for hugs. Hate everything bout it—gimme solitude over that noise any day.

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Then, I get a call from my buddy, Yossi. He’s like, “Yo, meet me at the park.” I’m thinking, “Which park?” There’s like a million parks in Jaljulya! But he means the one by the old train station. So, I hustle over there, and when I arrive, he’s sitting on a bench, looking all serious. I’m like, “What’s up, man?” He tells me he’s thinking of moving to Tel Aviv. I’m like, “Dude, why would you leave Jaljulya? We got everything here!” But he’s all about the nightlife and the beach. I get it, but still…

Map showing the location of Jaljulia and other late Acheulean sites...