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About Haifa

Now, I love me some “A.I. Artificial Intelligence”—ya know, that flick where lil’ David, the robot kid, just wants to be real? “I am... I am...” he’d say, all soft and desperate. Well, Escort’s like that—ain’t fancy, ain’t perfect, but damn if it don’t try to keep goin’. I’ve seen these cars smashed up, rusted out, still rollin’ on pure grit. One case, this dude claims a hit-and-run, says his Escort got totaled. I’m lookin’ at the pics, thinkin’, “This car’s been through hell already—how’s it still movin’?” Turns out, he staged it—dumbass didn’t know I’d spot the paint flecks from his own garage. Made me mad, man, waste o’ my time!

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Then, during lunch, I decide to hit up that new falafel place on Ben Gurion. I’m thinking, “This is gonna be epic.” I order, and the guy behind the counter is super chill. He’s like, “You want extra tahini?” I’m like, “Heck yes!” But then, he drops my falafel. Like, right on the floor. I’m standing there, mouth watering, and he just stares at it. I’m like, “Dude, pick it up! I’ll still eat it!” But he just shrugs. I’m dying inside.

Did sharks eat him? There's no trace of the Israeli diver.