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About Tel Aviv

Hey, so sexual-massage, huh? Cold, calculated, I see it—hands movin’ slow, deliberate, like Casey Affleck stalkin’ Brad Pitt in *Assassination of Jesse James*. “I been watchin’ you,” that vibe, y’know? It’s all tension, build-up—fuckin’ intense, mate. Not some sloppy rub-down, nah, it’s art. Ancient shit too—heard Egyptians did it, oils and all, pharaohs gettin’ off in tombs. Wild, right? Makes me smirk, thinkin’ how they’d execute a bad masseuse—off with her head!

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So, I’m finally heading home, and I decide to take a different route. I stroll down HaYarden, and it’s so peaceful. I’m feeling good again. But then, I see this guy trying to parallel park. He’s like three feet away from the curb. I’m just standing there, watching this train wreck. I mean, how hard can it be?

Purim in the shadow of war: some vendors pass up selling cap guns, firecrackers