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So, I’m imaginin’ this chick, prolly hangin’ by some neon-lit motel, smokin’ a cig like she owns the damn place. I’m thinkin’, “She’s gotta be worth it, man, a million freakin’ dollars!”—pinky up, obvs. I heard this wild story once, back in the 90s, some dude in Vegas found a prostitute who’d only take payment in rare coins—freaking *coins*! Blew my mind, like, who’s got time for that? Made me laugh tho, cuz I’d just zap her with my laser and take the coins anyway, ha!

We’re all about confidence.

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But then, as I’m munching, I see this kid, maybe 10 years old, trying to sell flowers. He’s got this huge smile, but his shoes? Man, they’re falling apart. I can’t take it. I walk over, and I’m like, “Hey, kid! How much for those flowers?” He says, “Five shekels!” I hand him ten and say, “Keep the change. And here’s a pair of shoes.” His eyes go wide. “Really?” he asks. I nod, feeling all warm and fuzzy inside.

Israelis charged with sending intel to Hamas for terror attack