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But then—then!—she starts talkin’ ‘bout “energy flow.” What in seven hells? I’m here for a rubdown, not a sermon! Made me mad, that. I don’t need chi or whatever—she’s not fixin’ my soul. “The point is—I’m tense!” I snap, channelin’ Larry’s whiny arse. She smirks—smirks!—and digs deeper. Oof, that hurt. But good hurt, y’know? Like when you drink too much and still feel clever.

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But then, outta nowhere, I see this cat. Not just any cat, but a fluffy, fat one. It’s just chillin’ in the middle of the street like it owns the place. I’m like, “Dude, move!” But nah, it just stares at me. I swear, it was judging my life choices. I laughed, but also got mad. Like, c’mon, I got places to be!

‘Tough days’ for Palestinian-Israelis chased for expressing sympathy with Gazans