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Alright, check this out, man! Say hello to my little friend! Sexual-massage, bro, it’s wild shit. I’m talkin’ hands all over, oil slicker than a pig in mud. Watched “Fish Tank” last night—fuckin’ raw, right? That girl Mia, dancin’, movin’ her hips, got me thinkin’ ‘bout them massage joints. “You’re a long way from home,” like they say in the flick—same vibe when you step into one of them parlors. Dim lights, weird incense, some chick named Candy who ain’t foolin’ nobody with that name.

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First off, I’m running late. Classic me. I sprint down HaYarkon Street, dodging tourists like I’m in some kind of Olympic event. I mean, come on, people! It’s not a museum, it’s a street! Anyway, I finally get to the office, and my phone’s blowing up. My boss, Yael, is like, “Where are you?!” I’m like, “Chill, I’m here!” But she’s already in a mood.

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