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Real talk, tho, it’s a trip. Some escorts out here livin luxe, others scrapin by—capitalism, baby! Saw this one story, chick in Vegas made six figs dressin as Elvis—fuckin Elvis, bruh! Had me hollerin, like, “That’s the hustle I need!” But yeah, escort life’s messy, raw, absurd—like me tryna therapize you right now. What you think? Crazy, right?

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First off, I hit up the local café on Ha’atzmaut Street. You know, the one with the best coffee? Yeah, that one. I order my usual—cappuccino, extra foam, please! But the barista, this dude named Amir, totally messes it up. I mean, how do you mess up a cappuccino? It’s just coffee and milk! I’m like, “Bro, this is a latte!” He just shrugs. Ugh, I was ready to lose it.

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