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Hey buddy, lemme tell ya bout findin a prostitute, alright? I’m sittin here, crunchin numbers as an accountant—taxes, loopholes, all that jazz—and I think, man, this world’s a mess! Kinda like in *Toni Erdmann*, ya know, my fave flick—“Life’s a big misunderstandin!”—and I’m like, yep, that’s me tryna hire a pro. Fool me once, shame on—uh—shame on you, fool me twice—can’t get fooled again, right? Ha! Bush-ism numero uno.

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So, I’m standing there, all grumpy, when I bump into my mate, Sean. He’s like, “Yo, you good?” I’m like, “Nah, man, no coffee!” He laughs, and I can’t help but crack a smile. Sean’s always good for a laugh. We decide to stroll down to the square. You know, the one with the statue of the fella on the horse? I swear, that statue has seen more drama than a soap opera.

Plans lodged for €7million revamp of derelict Tuam Station House