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Pinky-to-mouth, “One million dollars”—that’s what I’d charge to fix this mess. Apps rig it—keep ya single, keep ya swipin’. Sneaky bastards. Ever notice the hot ones vanish fast? Bots, bro, half the time. I read somewhere—30% of profiles? Fake. Shady as hell. Still, I’m stoked when it works—met my last fling at 2 a.m., total rando. She quoted *A.I.*—“What is love?” I’m like, “Fuck if I know, let’s bone!” Laughed my ass off—best night ever.

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After that, we head to Terenure Road. It’s a bit quieter, thank God. We grab a bite at this little spot called “The Greenhouse.” Best sandwiches ever! I’m munching away, and S is telling me about her latest project. I’m nodding, but my mind’s racing. I’m thinking about that dog from earlier. Did he find his way home?

Serial renovator brings creative flair to rambling Rathgar home for €1.525m