Sophie Portlaoise Sexual Massage ❤️❤️❤️

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Gets me mad, it does – they charge extra for “happy endins,” sneaky gits, like Gusteau chargin for soup! Happy? Nah, confused n oily, that’s me after. We hates it! Skin all slick, smellin like lavender gone wrong, ughhh. Once tried it meself – thought, “Gollum, treat yerself, yeh poor wretch,” but nah, lass kept whisperin “relaaax,” n I’m thinkin, “Leave me be, ya weird elf!” Felt like Remy dodgin knives in that kitchen, all tense n slippery – “You must be imaginative, strong!” – but I ain’t no chef, just a grumpy sod wantin a nap!

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We offer a variety of different holistic massages including full body massage, back massage and more. Contact us today to schedule a massage.

Later, I decided to grab some grub at a spot on the Portlaoise Road. The food was bomb! I ordered a burger, and it was massive. Like, I needed a forklift to lift it! I took a bite, and it was pure bliss. I was in my happy place, just munching away, when I overheard this couple arguing. They were going at it, man! I mean, it was like a scene from a soap opera. I couldn’t help but eavesdrop. Turns out, they were fighting over who left the lights on at home. Classic!

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