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About Cork

Me, I’d prolly suck at it. I’d waddle up, all “Uh, hi, you workin’?” and she’d be like, “Get lost, pink blob!” Hahaha, rude! But srsly, some places, it’s all sneaky—like, ya gotta know the corner, the bar, the vibe. Once saw a dude in a shady alley, whisperin’ to some chick, and I’m like, “Is he orderin’ pizza?” Nope, hooker deal! Made me mad tho—why so secret? Just say it, man!

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Perhaps the most consistently comical banter, though, comes from the trio of so-called “best friends” – actress Jaclyn (Michelle Monaghan).

When I get there, she’s all dramatic, like she’s in a movie. “I need it for tonight!” I’m like, “Chill, it’s just a coat.” But she’s not havin’ it. I hand it over, and she’s all smiles. I guess it’s worth it to see her happy, but man, I’m exhausted.

Man to be sentenced over fatal Monaghan road crash