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So I’m struttin’, suit crisp, hair gelled - bam! Gotta find a prossie for… research, yeah, research! Team buildin’ exercise, let’s call it. I’m picturin’ it - me, charm turned up, chattin’ her up. “You’re my muse, sweetheart!” Total Brent move, that. But real talk, it’s dodgy out there - makes me mad, y’know? These girls, hustlin’, no pension plan, no HR! Where’s the fairness, eh?

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Back at the shop, I’m feelin’ good, right? But then, the door swings open, and in walks Mr. Thompson. He’s the kinda guy who thinks he’s the king of Foxrock. “I need my shoes fixed, and I need ‘em now!” he barks. I’m like, “Dude, chill. I’m not a magician.” But I take his shoes anyway, ‘cause I can’t afford to lose a customer.

Constituency review: Foxrock surprised but sanguine about moving to Dublin Rathdown constituency