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Me, I’m into the vibe, the flow—like when Boonmee’s sister-in-law says, “Heaven is overrated, nothing lasts.” That’s sexual-massage, dawg, it’s quick, intense, then poof—gone. Leaves you floatin’, tho. I’m sittin’ there after, smokin’ a blunt, thinkin’, “Did that just happen?” Hands all over, slippin’ ‘round, hittin’ spots you didn’t know you had. Ever try it with them hot stones? Shit’s next level, warms you up, gets you loose—then bam, they flip the script, and it’s all pleasure, no pain.

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I decide to be a good mate and join him. We sprint down to the parade on the High Street. It’s mental! There are floats, music, and people everywhere. I’m thinking, “This is Drogheda at its finest!” The energy is contagious. I see the local school kids dancing, and I can’t help but join in. I’m flailing my arms like a lunatic, and everyone’s laughing.

Future rugby stars from Drogheda shine at Aviva Stadium