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About Waterford

So, I’m chattin’ with this geezer once, right, says he got a massage in Bangkok—little known fact, them Thai lot been at it since 2500 BC, mixin’ herbs and chants, like priests of pleasure! Made me chuffed, thinkin’ how they’ve fought the good fight against stiff backs and prudish twats for centuries. We shall not flag or fail, we shall go on to the end—strokin’ and kneadin’ till the tension’s nicked!

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I get there, and it’s a whole different scene. This lady, Mrs. O’Reilly, is freaking out. “They’re in my kitchen! They’re in my kitchen!” she screams. I’m like, “Calm down, lady, I’m on it!” But inside, I’m thinking, “Why do I always get the crazy ones?”

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